(Last Updated On: August 24, 2018)
This first update to our Biggest Pet Peeves List is long overdue. I have been busy but thankfully I had been noticing some things that can make us peevers go bonkers.
Some of you have suggested a few which I may mention here. Please note that these peeves are expressed in a spirit of light humor. If you haven’t read our first post, Biggest Pet Peeves – part 1, please do so here. Please remember to sign up to our mailing list.
1. People Who Lick Their Fingers
Fingers anyone? Without warning and especially at the table, this habit is quite trendy among all walks of life and cultures. Do I need to remind you that you are not eating alone? After snacking on your fingers as part of the main course or for dessert, you proceed to touch all the utensils we other humans have to touch. It simply isn’t fair to us. We cringe in our seats wishing you would just stop. You have ruined our day and then you wonder why we are so grumpy at the table. When we say something about it then you get annoyed. How would you feel if we were to spit in our hands, rub it evenly into a nice paste and then touch what you have to touch? Did I mention dipping your whole hand in the chips and nuts bowl and ignoring the lonely spoon and mini plates begging for your attention?
These are 3 reasons to stop licking your fingers, from today
- It is not easy on the eyes
- Fingers are not part of the meal
- There are napkins screaming “please use me, that’s what I’m here for”
3. There are people screaming at you on the inside
3. It is unhygienic for reasons we don’t necessarily care to list
3. What is that under your nails?
Sorry! Did I say three reasons?
2. People Who Talk with Food in Their Mouths
Is my mouth open as wide as a football? While you are at it, please count how many cavities and fillings I have…Yes, those are my inflamed tonsils, I forgot to tell you about.
In case you didn’t notice, there is also a swimming pool because I am drinking before I swallow.
Finally, those are actual golf balls coming from my mouth and are purposefully aimed at you.
If you never knew, this is a great time to learn that your mouth is not your stomach. We don’t need to see how food is digested in your mouth rather than in your stomach. There is a reason why God made it so that we wouldn’t have to see it. We are praying really hard and hoping at best, that you would just shut up and eat.
3. People Who Refuse to Stop Talking at the Movies…or Stop Talking Period
There are people everywhere who just love to test our character. We love them but they test us way too hard…
It’s not our fault that you have chosen to see the movie three or four times (Yeah, seriously! But that’s a topic for a later post). Now you are using this occasion to talk about other stuff or give us spoilers we didn’t ask for. We just wish you would stop talking so we can hear the movie without having to interrupt you.
When we do ask you to stop, we are the ones who have a problem. What would help us is a button built into our seats to either zap you silly or make us look like Godzilla when you turn around or maybe alert the authorities so they can speak to you.
4. Whatsapp Tales from the Darker Side
Now we love our family and friends a lot (usually in that order). However, WhatsApp was invented for us to chat via the internet, without having to spend tons on texts on mobile data. We thank you. However, with each amazing add-on and improvement, the lovely developers there at FaceBook have been inadvertently enabling amateur photographers, videographers, and the overbearing “pass-on-ners.”
This thriving army of budding professionals has made it their business, to make everything that happens in the world, my business. They are convinced somehow that it’s their mission in life to be the next Bang Bang Club Click To Tweet That’s not all. If we are lucky, we will be getting the same trendy video about ten to twelve times a day for the next three days or so. Drop it while it’s hot I guess.
All this is happening while the non-techies are complaining that they are unable to install any more apps. I wonder who or what the culprit is.
On a serious note. Unfortunately, we also have the shockers club. This group sends images of gruesome events and the latest road fatalities, sometimes even before a family is officially notified. Please stop!
Did I mention persons who place calls using WhatsApp-calling (though I have been a culprit myself a few times. I need to stop) or those who believe it’s their right to place a video call to my phone at the very moment that I am unkempt and shirtless at my computer?
And finally…This one is divided into three parts to help with digestion. Grab a cup of tea or coffee. Make it strong as this will be the longest and most tedious one.
5. People Who Refuse to Use Spell Check
I once came across a very funny rebuke on one of the Social media platforms of a conversation between a young man and woman. This young man is having a crafty chat (leaning on the courting side and going in his favor, or so he thought) and misspells one word too many. This unimpressed young lady has had enough and decided she must blast him for his laziness. Her excellent point is a lesson for us all. Her words were something like this: “Why don’t you learn to spell? You are online with dictionaries all over and yet you refuse to check your words before you send them to me?”
Aww, that hurts, doesn’t it? Now is this young lady wrong if she has set standards for herself? The laziness of this young man speaks volumes that would be sure to deafen her in the future. Do you feel sorry for him?
People Who Refuse to Take a Hint
I am no expert in the English language, but I like to think that I am fairly good at it. What I don’t know I research or do a refresher as the case may be.
Do you want to see your biggest pet-peeve mentioned? Suggest it here. We can credit you if you desire and if we agree it’s good. You may even win a prize for submitting the best one.
Ok, getting back to our final topic. I was chatting in WhatsApp with a friend, who suddenly decided to use a trumped-up word. No; not cuss words nor bad grammar. Misspellings of the sort that one can’t bear to ignore. The kind that makes your eyes hurt just looking at them. Yes, ones like “covfefe.” The code word with the hidden meaning only some folk could understand.
I am not very presidential in following the “politically correct” protocol. For this reason, my wife has always been the preferred and better half of our union. I apologize for this but I can’t help most of the time. Does this mean that I am perfect? I am in no way…yet. Does this mean that I am unkind? No! Most find me fairly friendly but dry.
The person in my first scenario is way younger than I am, so I proceeded to enlighten them in the correct way. That worked for a while after which they reintroduced their concocted words with poise. So much for that. Two days after as we were having a similar conversation, they dropped the word again, not once but twice in the same paragraph. Now, I am done with that. The lesson learned here? Some and their words are better left alone.
People Who Refuse to Be Corrected at All
Another scenario is one of me trading words, i.e. correct word for incorrect word in a “heated” exchange, though unknown to them.
We were talking about a popular song which they incorrectly mispronounced every time they mentioned it. Cheekily but subtly, I responded with the correct pronunciation numerous times, hoping that they would spare my ears the throbbing. It got so overbearing that I had to reluctantly correct them as nicely as I could. They were gracious and said they thought that their pronunciation was right… I even googled and sent the pronunciation to them. However, the next night in another conversation, they dropped the “word” again. I am still wearing my earplugs from the explosion. Keep your cool and learn to laugh at yourself.
I understand that everyone may not be good at grammar or speak like Sir Winston Churchill, and I am in no way advocating going around correcting anyone. However, we all should be humble, wise and always willing to learn. When someone hints a correction at us, don’t continue in your own way. Be always ready, attentive and willing to learn and improve yourself.
See you next time and God bless you!