How to apologize and move on


(Last Updated On: January 20, 2018)

Apology accepted

Some time ago, I sent out a few letters of apology and made some calls.
The long and short of the matter is that I received favorable responses from all.  I put aside my feelings, humbled myself and reached out, despite the length of time that has passed. This is a milestone for me. It shows that I have matured.

More importantly, though, the journey to self-improvement and maturity, had revealed certain faults long straight roadI had.  I was forced to take look deep within myself.  There I discovered that the person living inside was quite ugly at times and I was hard on myself for it.  It is one thing to acknowledge one’s flaws, but it is another thing to carry the responsibility of hurting or offending others, whether you thought you were right or not.  Especially those who have passed on into eternity, and therefore, cannot accept an apology.

Maturity comes at a cost

What most people don’t know is that as you mature, it is as though a spotlight is turned on and illuminates your imperfections.  You are transported to moments in time where you erred.  The reason for that is simple.  It’s  for you to acknowledge those mistakes, take responsibility, learn from those moments and heal, so you can move on. That phase of the initial healing process is very difficult to deal with, if not managed properly.

 Apologize and be free

Olive branch
Offering the olive branch
  • It purges the soul of needless clutter and provides a sense of healing
  • It doesn’t matter whether people reciprocate the apology
  • Life is too short to continue on its journey with extra baggage
  • It is very important to apologize in order to move forward
  • Take responsibility for past mistakes without blaming anyone
  • Be sincere!

How to go about apologizing

The medium chosen depends on a number of things. You decide whether to

  • email
  • call
  • message
  • speak in person
  • write a letter

That doesn’t matter in my opinion.  The objective is to accomplish the task at hand.  You will know which medium best suits you according to the situation that had transpired in the past and the person you are apologizing to.  Someone once illustrated un-forgiveness like this… “It’s like placing the other person in a headlock but in this state, none of you can truly go anywhere.”

It will always be a part of your consciousness, convicting and reminding you that something is unresolved.  Don’t bury it any longer.  Email or call that person(s) now, apologize and move on.   Please share your experience after you have done so. 

Be a better human being!

Do it now!

Please feel free to comment below.


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6 Replies to “How to apologize and move on”

  1. Apologizing is a hard thing to do, more than people really realize. A TRUE apology; one that is from the heart, with meaning, and reason. I’m an advocate of in person apologies (when you can) because to me that is the most difficult and most meaningful. If you truly mean what you are saying you will say it to their face, looking in their eyes. But from what you’re saying, it doesn’t matter in the way you do it, as long as you do it. I don’t know if I agree? One thing is correct – life is too short! So maybe you have a point…choose the method that works for you even if that’s via an email.

  2. Hi Vali,

    Thanks for taking the time to read the post.

    Yes it is hard to apologize but I have heard that the things that seem hard to do, may be a lot easier to do than we think. I believe the reward is far greater in the end for all involved, if we can get past the difficulty.
    In the age of tech I personally don’t think it matters how we do it, but to each his own. You could be right.

    Thanks again!

  3. What a wonderful article! Its amazing how something so simple and easy to do can reap such fabulous emotional rewards. Why do we put things off like this I wonder? Its almost like a ‘pay it forward’ surprise treat, to be able to send someone an apology. Thank you so much for the inspiration and like a Christmas card list, I’ll be creating my apology list this holiday season too!

    1. Hi Emily. Thanks so much for your kind words and your willingness to act on this.  I know you will feel as free as bird after you have done so.  Let me know how it goes.  All the best to you.

  4. For me it used to be very hard and stressful to apologize for something. Maybe it’s because of social anxiety or just because I hate that feeling when I’m wrong about something so I really had to change my mindset about this, but like you said, it’s very important to apologize in order to move forward. Great article

    1. Thanks very much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts. I am glad you are aware of the benefits of apologizing. It frees your soul and makes you feel better about yourself. Also, you get to free someone else in the process. All the best to you!

      David

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