How to Apologize and Move on – Let Go!

(Last Updated On: November 4, 2018)

Some time ago, I sent out a few letters of apology and made some calls. I put aside my feelings, humbled myself and reached out despite the length of time that had passed. The long and short of the matter is that I received favorable responses from all. This was a milestone for me. It showed me that I had matured (beyond thinking about my own feelings).

More importantly, the journey to maturity had revealed certain faults I had. I was forced to take look deep within myself. There, I discovered that the person living inside was quite unattractive at times.

long straight road

It is one thing to acknowledge your flaws, but it’s another to carry the burden of hurting or offending others (whether you thought you were right).  Especially, if some have passed on and so, cannot accept an apology.

Maturity Comes at a Cost

As we mature, it’s as though a spotlight is turned on and begins to highlight our imperfections.  We are taken back down memory-lane to moments in time where we erred and we begin to see the situation a bit more clearly. This is so we acknowledge our mistakes, own them, learn from the experience, and move on. Maturity does come at a cost, but it’s worth it.

Apologize and Be Free

  • It purges the soul of needless clutter and provides a sense of healing
  • It doesn’t matter whether people reciprocate the apology
  • Life is too short to continue on its journey with extra baggage
  • It is very important to apologize in order to move forward
  • We must take responsibility for past mistakes without blaming anyone
  • Be sincere!

How to Go About Apologizing

The medium chosen depends on many things. You decide whether to

  • *email
  • call
  • message
  • speak in person
  • write a letter

* this will depend on the person

The medium shouldn’t matter for most, as the primary aim is to apologize (I know this will be debatable) but you will know which medium is appropriate according to:

  1. The situation that had transpired in the past
  2. The person you are apologizing to

Perhaps, you should follow up with a call if you are uncertain about the email.

Someone once illustrated unforgiveness like this… “It’s like placing the other person in a headlock but in this state, none of you can truly go anywhere.”

It will always be eating away at your conscience, convicting and reminding you that something is unresolved.  Don’t rob yourself of living a life with a clear conscience. Call that person(s) now, apologize and move on.

Please share your experience after you have done so.

Be a better human being. Do it now.

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David

David

David is a musician and IT professional with a passion for writing. When he is not doing any of the above, he can be found watching funny videos and eating chocolates. Laughter (and chocolates) is the best medicine!

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6 Replies to “How to Apologize and Move on – Let Go!”

  1. Apologizing is a hard thing to do, more than people really realize. A TRUE apology; one that is from the heart, with meaning, and reason. I’m an advocate of in person apologies (when you can) because to me that is the most difficult and most meaningful. If you truly mean what you are saying you will say it to their face, looking in their eyes. But from what you’re saying, it doesn’t matter in the way you do it, as long as you do it. I don’t know if I agree? One thing is correct – life is too short! So maybe you have a point…choose the method that works for you even if that’s via an email.

  2. Hi Vali,

    Thanks for taking the time to read the post.

    Yes it is hard to apologize but I have heard that the things that seem hard to do, may be a lot easier to do than we think. I believe the reward is far greater in the end for all involved, if we can get past the difficulty.
    In the age of tech I personally don’t think it matters how we do it, but to each his own. You could be right.

    Thanks again!

  3. What a wonderful article! Its amazing how something so simple and easy to do can reap such fabulous emotional rewards. Why do we put things off like this I wonder? Its almost like a ‘pay it forward’ surprise treat, to be able to send someone an apology. Thank you so much for the inspiration and like a Christmas card list, I’ll be creating my apology list this holiday season too!

    1. Hi Emily. Thanks so much for your kind words and your willingness to act on this.  I know you will feel as free as bird after you have done so.  Let me know how it goes.  All the best to you.

  4. For me it used to be very hard and stressful to apologize for something. Maybe it’s because of social anxiety or just because I hate that feeling when I’m wrong about something so I really had to change my mindset about this, but like you said, it’s very important to apologize in order to move forward. Great article

    1. Thanks very much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts. I am glad you are aware of the benefits of apologizing. It frees your soul and makes you feel better about yourself. Also, you get to free someone else in the process. All the best to you!

      David

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